When people think of humility they often think of humiliation. Although they go together, they have completely different meanings. To be humiliated is to be shamed or dishonored, but to live in humility means to be humble and to live in total confidence of Christ’s love. When we are humiliated we often become upset or seek revenge, but to live in humility allows us to look past the judgments and know that we don’t have to base our identities on what others think. The tricky part is knowing when someone is being honest and trying to make us better, or if they are just trying to hurt us. It’s one thing to be humiliated, but it’s another thing to humiliate yourself.
When I was 8 or 9 years old my parents decided to take a trip up to see family in Maryland. The trip was coming to an end so we all decided to have a crab boil. Numerous crabs were bought and the water was seasoned and before long I was going to have some crab because I LOVE CRAB! Right before it was time to eat my parents decided they wanted to go take a tour of their cousin’s new home, and guess what I had to go too. That meant I was going to miss out on some of the delicious crab.
Well we got to the cousin’s house and completed the tour, which I showed no interest because I only had crab on the mind, and we started to head back to the crab boil. While we were out taking the tour, my uncle decided to put up a screen door he just bought to keep the bugs from getting in the house. He just finished hanging the screen door when we arrived, and I jumped out of the car screaming save some for me. As I began to run inside to get a plate I felt my momentum slow and a fabric push against my face. Seconds later I lay in the floor with the screen mesh wrapped around me, I just ran right through the screen door my uncle put up. It was humiliating but at the age it lasted 30 seconds and I was eating the crab I so desperately wanted. By the way, I just pulled the screen out from the door and didn’t rip it, so it was easily repaired.
But I am not talking about that humiliation, I am talking about when people call us out on things that we do. Because it’s hard to see our own faults, consciously and subconsciously, sometimes people have to point them out for us. This is very tough to deal with even when you are aware of the problem. We can feel attacked and get defensive, but it’s all about whom and how these opportunities are presented that determines how we act upon the comments. From life’s experiences, most criticisms come from dislike or misperceptions from others we don’t consider close friends or family. These are the instances when we should look away and not worry about what those individuals say. But then there are times when our close friends and family point these opportunities out, and at that point you have to decide are they doing this for your best interest or not?
When our friends and family are being honest, they are bringing up these opportunities out of love because they want to see you overcome that sin or negative character trait. And if they don’t tell you they feel they may lose you as a friend or they have failed you as a friend by not trying to help you overcome a sin. But if we live in humility we can take those hard discussions and get better from them rather than living in false humility.
False humility is when you falsely accept what others have told you and you do nothing to try and fix the opportunities in your life. You acknowledge that you have the opportunities and on the outside you are putting on a show for everyone, but on the inside you are still living in sin. I think we all battle with this, including myself. It’s tough when someone calls you out for something that you had no clue you were doing, or you knew it was occurring you just didn’t realize it was hurting the people you love the most.
When I was a child I had a huge problem with lying. I would lie about doing my homework, cleaning my room, and if I took some cookies from the cookie jar. When you are young you often don’t see the big picture and lying is just a way for you to stay out of trouble at that point in time. The concept of you losing someone’s trust never crosses your mind at that age. When I was called out by my parents for lying, I would lie about being a liar. But as I grew I began to realize that those lies I told affected my relationship with my parents. They always had to check up on what I said I did: cleaning my room, completing my homework, and where I was going. Then I would get upset every time they checked up on me because I felt they didn’t trust me, and for the longest time it never clicked why.
On the other side of humility is being humble when complemented because we all know it feels great to get complements! When you are told that you have done something right or well, it feels great because there is a sense of accomplishment. YOU feel like YOU have done something right and if YOU wouldn’t have done it, the job would have never gotten done. If you notice there are a lot of YOU’s in that sentence, but it’s to show that when you take pride in getting complements it becomes more about you than Jesus. When you live in humility you know that Jesus gave you the talents to complete those tasks, and when you receive your praise you should humble yourself to Jesus.
When we take pride in the complements we receive we begin to think more highly of ourselves that we ought, and then we start to become prideful, conceited, and arrogant. We all know what that person is like, sometimes it is ourselves at times, but what we don’t realize is that if we take those complements as rewards now that will have been our reward for eternity. Jesus makes a great point about this in Matthew 7 when false disciples were casting out demons and performed many miracles and wanting to enter in the Kingdom of Heaven. What those false disciples didn’t realize was that they were performing these acts for themselves to get praise and recognition. They weren’t doing it for Jesus, and the reward they received were the praises they received on earth, but they will spend eternity in hell.
In conclusion, if we should boast in anything it should be in Jesus Christ who gave us life and hope. Living a life of humility isn’t living a dull life with no positives, living a life of humility keeps your head on your shoulders and allows you to grow spiritually and mentally. If we were all perfect we wouldn’t have needed Christ, then we could boast in ourselves. But we are not perfect, so listen to those who love you when they point out the opportunities in your lives. Most of all don’t praise yourself too much, what you accomplish is because of Christ working in your life, not your own doing. Love on one another and don’t be afraid to speak up to your friends and family when they are in the wrong as well. We owe it to Christ and ourselves to make each other better so not only can we spread the good news, but to also show what Christ can do while working through us.
Praise always be to My Savior, Jesus Christ!
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